Creepers on the Internet,

So today, I learned there are many creepers on the internet.

Creeper Weaboos that have creepy fetishes for feet.
I never thought I'd ever met one.

Well, I got extremely creeped out and pissed.
So I got my friend Abby to TROLL the shit out of the creep.
It was fucking so god damned hilarious.
He was going to send the kid "an amazing trojan horse".
But in the end we decided to not to.
I don't want him to get into trouble.
So I suggested him to do something else,
y'all would see at the very end.

Here are little snippets that I thought sent me to LOLheaven.
This whole convo was fucking WIN.

"A (7:39:30 PM): like, i was with my friend at the mall yesterday
A (7:39:48 PM): and i tried to make myself prettyyy
A (7:40:00 PM): i bought myself some cute little heels
A (7:40:07 PM): and i had to go
A (7:40:09 PM): and ruin them
A (7:40:22 PM): she convinced me to take a picture but blehh
Creeper (7:40:25 PM): how did you mess up your shoes?
A (7:40:37 PM): oh its not the shoes, i just made them look ugly
Creeper (7:40:48 PM): whhhhaat
Creeper (7:40:51 PM): thats nonsense
A (7:40:57 PM): YOURE nonsense.
Creeper (7:40:59 PM): i wanna see how you look
Creeper (7:41:18 PM): im not nonsense!!! im mikosan the 2nd degree black belt instructor of greatwood!
Creeper (7:41:37 PM): i am highly respected person i am not nonsense >_<
A (7:41:43 PM): lol
A (7:41:55 PM): well okay then, miko-sama
ATTENTION (7:42:03 PM): Transfer complete: 0050231111Au.jpg.
Creeper (7:42:22 PM): you are on the right?
A (7:42:30 PM): left :[
A (7:42:33 PM): SEE?
Creeper (7:42:38 PM): oh your hair looks different
A (7:42:40 PM): shes prettier than me
A (7:42:43 PM): yeah i tied it up
Creeper (7:42:43 PM): i am looking at the previous picture
Creeper (7:42:49 PM): i like it!
Creeper (7:43:01 PM): i like this picture more than the one you sent before
A (7:43:12 PM): ewww whyyy
Creeper (7:43:14 PM): whats wrong with the shoes
Creeper (7:43:16 PM): they look good on you
A (7:43:20 PM): look at them!
A (7:43:25 PM): and look at my blouse!
A (7:43:28 PM): and my skirt!
Creeper (7:43:28 PM): you have really nice legs
A (7:43:34 PM): O-o
A (7:43:36 PM): i do?
Creeper (7:43:37 PM): it looks nice
Creeper (7:43:39 PM): yes
Creeper (7:43:46 PM): i would take you on date ^_^
A (7:43:53 PM): awww youre so sweet
Creeper (7:43:57 PM): haha
Creeper (7:44:12 PM): you should wear heels more
Creeper (7:44:15 PM): it looks nice on you
A (7:44:19 PM): grossss
A (7:44:24 PM): i dont wear heels
Creeper (7:44:29 PM): why?
A (7:45:00 PM): they hurt my heels
A (7:45:03 PM): ahaha
A (7:45:07 PM): i cant walk in them :[
Creeper (7:47:20 PM): would you wear them for me?
A (7:47:30 PM): would you carry me for them?
A (7:47:31 PM): ahaha
Creeper (7:47:37 PM): yes !
A (7:47:41 PM): :o
A (7:47:46 PM): oh mr samurai~
A (7:47:53 PM): im heavier than a sword you know
Creeper (7:47:57 PM): hahahha
Creeper (7:48:25 PM): it doenst matter how big you are i will carry a pretty girl even if i brake my back
Creeper (7:48:26 PM): hahaha
A (7:48:34 PM): :[
A (7:48:38 PM): you think id break your back?
Creeper (7:48:44 PM): no not you
Creeper (7:48:55 PM): but the truth is i could hurt my back picking up a pencil
Creeper (7:49:06 PM): my back is very hurt from training so much "

"Creeper (7:20:59 PM): so you don't have a pic of you that i can see?
Creeper (7:21:03 PM): =/
A (7:21:14 PM): oh i think i dooo
Creeper (7:21:22 PM): show me
A (7:22:19 PM): alright gimme a sex
A (7:22:22 PM): LOL
A (7:22:23 PM): i mean sec
Creeper (7:23:00 PM): hahaha
Creeper (7:23:04 PM): give you sex
Creeper (7:23:05 PM): hahahhahaha
Creeper (7:23:12 PM): that was the most epic typo of 2009
A (7:23:22 PM): C:"

"Creeper (7:49:47 PM): my name is miko and i teach tae kwon do
A (7:49:56 PM): miko? are you hawaiian?
Creeper (7:49:59 PM): lol no
A (7:50:01 PM): do you live in hawaii?
Creeper (7:50:04 PM): i am white american guy
Creeper (7:50:08 PM): i never live in hawaii
Creeper (7:50:11 PM): i live in texas
A (7:50:14 PM): oh oh okayyy
A (7:50:15 PM):
Creeper (7:50:21 PM): where do you live?
A (7:50:25 PM): i live in arlen
Creeper (7:50:31 PM): you also live in texas?!
A (7:50:36 PM): where i sell propane and propane acessories
Creeper (7:50:40 PM): hahahahha
Creeper (7:50:45 PM): i live near houston
A (7:50:57 PM): ah i dont live anywhere near texas
Creeper (7:51:03 PM): oh
Creeper (7:51:04 PM): = (
A (7:51:10 PM): im wayyy over in arizona"

"ATTENTION (8:03:25 PM): Direct IM session initiated. What is this?
A (8:03:47 PM): oh wooow
A (8:03:49 PM): youre cute
ATTENTION (8:04:07 PM): Direct IM session disconnected. What is this?
ATTENTION (8:04:30 PM): Direct IM session initiated. What is this?
Creeper (8:04:54 PM): those are recent
Creeper (8:05:02 PM): my old pics i look like samurai
A (8:05:34 PM): grow your hair out again :o
A (8:05:40 PM): i like i like i like
Creeper (8:06:01 PM): i dont like my hair long anymore
Creeper (8:06:04 PM): its hard to keep
A (8:06:11 PM): its so nice though
Creeper (8:06:12 PM): unless i have a girl or someone to comb it for me ^_>
A (8:06:19 PM): ill comb it for youuu
Creeper (8:06:22 PM): ok
Creeper (8:06:34 PM): well if you were here with me i would definatley grow my hair out for you
A (8:06:41 PM): alright
A (8:06:42 PM): do it
A (8:06:48 PM): and ill wear heels for you
A (8:06:48 PM): haha
Creeper (8:07:17 PM): lol i like to shave
Creeper (8:07:17 PM): you should take pics for me
A (8:07:40 PM): of you shaving?
Creeper (8:07:48 PM): hahaha nooooo
Creeper (8:07:53 PM): take pics of you and send them to me
Creeper (8:07:54 PM): sillly
A (8:08:06 PM): i guess i could
Creeper (8:08:45 PM): you guesss you could
Creeper (8:08:46 PM): awwh
Creeper (8:08:51 PM): am i not good enough to take pics for = (
A (8:09:05 PM): i dont take pics thoughhh
A (8:09:09 PM): no likeyyy
Creeper (8:09:13 PM): but its for miko!
A (8:09:16 PM): :o
Creeper (8:09:17 PM): think of that
A (8:09:30 PM): lemme get my camera fixed
Creeper (8:09:36 PM): ok
Creeper (8:09:45 PM): you don't have any pics now that you can show me from your computer?
A (8:10:39 PM): ohoho of course i do!
A (8:10:43 PM): why didnt you just ask
Creeper (8:11:32 PM): well i want both
Creeper (8:11:40 PM): haha i want some pictures that you have and i want you to take some
Creeper (8:11:54 PM): in heels ^__< since you like wearing them so much
A (8:11:55 PM): oh dont worry ill take some for youu
A (8:11:59 PM): HAHAHA
A (8:12:10 PM): ahhhh i really dont want to buy any heels right now
Creeper (8:12:13 PM): or flats
Creeper (8:12:16 PM): do you wear flats?
A (8:12:33 PM): nah i wear flipflops most of the time
Creeper (8:12:40 PM): oh
A (8:12:43 PM): what is this fascination with footwear :o
Creeper (8:12:50 PM): its what i like
Creeper (8:12:52 PM): sorry = (
A (8:12:56 PM): shoes?
Creeper (8:13:01 PM): on girls yes
A (8:13:25 PM): ahhh so you want me to just tkae pics of my shoes then lolol
Creeper (8:13:41 PM): i think heels makes legs look nicer and makes girls taller becasue i am tall guy it is nice to have a short girl be a little taller to be closer to my face to kiss her ^_<
A (8:13:53 PM): aw thats so cutee
A (8:14:09 PM): i cant wear heels a lot though
A (8:14:13 PM): something about my tendon
Creeper (8:14:22 PM): oh...well i dont want you to hurt yourself to impress me
A (8:14:27 PM): something near there is like, pinched on both sides...?
A (8:14:44 PM): but yeah tight-fitting shoes make my toes feel like theyre burning
Creeper (8:14:46 PM): i think if you came here to me. and stayed with me i would be willing to do anything for you haha
A (8:15:03 PM): :o!
Creeper (8:15:09 PM): well at least for a picture you dont have to keep the shoes on right
Creeper (8:15:11 PM): lol
A (8:15:19 PM): you may be right about that
Creeper (8:15:31 PM): and i guess you could take pics of just the shoes if you wanted to be lazy
Creeper (8:15:36 PM): but i would also like to see you wearing them
A (8:16:03 PM): oh okayyyy
Creeper (8:16:20 PM): how were you able to send them to me before
Creeper (8:16:29 PM): ...theycame as files
A (8:16:30 PM): oh i didnt take these pics today :o
Creeper (8:16:34 PM): send me pics that way
Creeper (8:16:38 PM): the way you sent me the other pics
Creeper (8:16:41 PM): i want to learn how to do that
ATTENTION (8:16:47 PM): Transfer complete: 001x05111Au.jpg.
ATTENTION (8:16:51 PM): Transfer complete: 001v05111Au.jpg."

"Creeper (8:23:42 PM): yah you like it ^_<
Creeper (8:23:43 PM): i know you do
A (8:24:33 PM): i certainly do
Creeper (8:24:38 PM): i like your hair up
A (8:25:22 PM): you do?
A (8:25:24 PM): i dontt
Creeper (8:25:28 PM): yeah i do
Creeper (8:25:37 PM): makes it easier for me to kiss your neck
Creeper (8:25:40 PM): mmm ^_______^
A (8:26:10 PM): oohh :o
A (8:26:39 PM): hmm
Creeper (8:26:59 PM): haha im sorry
Creeper (8:27:02 PM): you might have bf
A (8:27:07 PM): i dont
A (8:27:11 PM): ive never had one
Creeper (8:27:15 PM): well
Creeper (8:27:27 PM): i would definatley take you out and be your bf if you were here with me
Creeper (8:27:32 PM): you are a very sweet girl
Creeper (8:27:36 PM): and i would definatley like to know you more
A (8:27:38 PM): and you are a very sweet guy
Creeper (8:28:12 PM): its not everyday that a gorgeous girl with a pretty name IMs me lol
A (8:28:30 PM): lol i dont think im gorgeous
Creeper (8:28:34 PM): well i think so
A (8:28:36 PM): i dont think im even pretty
Creeper (8:28:37 PM): so be happy -_<
Creeper (8:29:14 PM): and i am definatley looking foward to when you can take pics
Creeper (8:29:17 PM): i want to see more of you
Creeper (8:30:35 PM): but you have never had bf before so that means you never have sex
Creeper (8:30:40 PM): ......=/
A (8:30:49 PM): dingdingdingg~
A (8:30:50 PM): lol
Creeper (8:31:01 PM): hmm
Creeper (8:31:06 PM): but what if i want to have sex?
Creeper (8:31:11 PM): and you are here with me?
A (8:31:23 PM): hmm i dont know what we'd do then
Creeper (8:31:36 PM): well i would never force you to do something you dont want to do
Creeper (8:31:53 PM): but if a girl like you is near me i will be very excited in my pants hahahaa
A (8:32:01 PM): oh im flattered
Creeper (8:32:11 PM): i am just being honest
A (8:32:14 PM): i dunno, maybe you can teach me something...
Creeper (8:32:18 PM): yah?
Creeper (8:32:26 PM): so you would be willing to try things with me?
A (8:32:35 PM): id be willing to TRY
Creeper (8:32:50 PM): wow thats all i would want
A (8:32:51 PM): but i dunno about going all the way and doing everythingggggg
Creeper (8:32:56 PM): yeah
Creeper (8:33:01 PM): well there no rush in that sort of thing
Creeper (8:33:16 PM): i think sex is something you should wait for untill you love someone
A (8:33:30 PM): i agreeee
Creeper (8:33:34 PM): i have just met you but i am definatley interested to stay and touch with you and spend time in person
Creeper (8:33:40 PM): maybe i could love you someday lol
A (8:35:15 PM): that strikes me as something pretty odd to say
A (8:35:28 PM): to another man
Creeper (8:35:37 PM): your a man!?
A (8:35:48 PM): i got the wrong guy
A (8:35:56 PM): someone with a similar sn to yours
A(8:36:06 PM): has been harassing my little brother online
Creeper (8:36:15 PM): = (
A (8:36:22 PM): my bad, bro
Creeper (8:36:25 PM): well i said i didnt talk to you before
Creeper (8:36:29 PM): who is the girl in the pictureS?
A (8:36:40 PM): lol one of my friends
Creeper (8:36:49 PM): why the fuck would do something like that to someone?
A (8:37:03 PM): dude, this guy was really fucking with my bro
Creeper (8:37:11 PM): i havnt done shit to you
A (8:37:22 PM): yeah but i thought you did something to someone i care about
A (8:37:30 PM): maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah bad
Creeper (8:37:35 PM): you need to get your shit straight before you start plaing with peoples emotions and stuff
Creeper (8:37:42 PM): you should go to hell for that "

(highlighted & bolded & big-fonted words were the WIN PHRASES & REACTIONS)

HIT THE CREEPER SO HARD AND UNEXPECTEDLY.
Even though I know that was going to come,
but I DIDN'T EVEN EXPECT IT TO COME LIKE RIGHT THEN AND THERE.
Fucking perfect timing.

You've just been upgraded to trolladin.

This whole convo made me laugh so hard.
Oh my God.
Life is so good to me.

~DT