Sonata Arctica,

Their music is full of so much emotion.
It immediately changes my mood.
I will be attending their upcoming headlining show at The Galaxy. (I am very excited)
I found out my old guitar teacher's band "Ellerman" will be playing with them.
I was screaming and was totally shocked for a couple of minutes, once I found out.
HE'S SO GOD DAMNED LUCKY. PLAYING ALONG SUCH GREAT MUSICIANS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway, I have their discography down and I have been listening to it non-stop for the last 2 hours or so. I am in a current S.A. phase. I am not sure if it's a phase, but I am definately loving their music. A LOT. I just cannot explain how beautiful it is.

Tony's vocals. I learned how to sing the right way listening to this band. (While attempting to sing Fullmoon, I will never be able to sing as powerfully good as Tony, seriously.)
It was the song "Fullmoon" that got me into this band and into power metal in general.

I decided to search up their name on google and I stumbled onto their official page.
I started reading the band member's little biography introduction information type thing. I got to Elias Viljanen's life philosophy and saw that it said "Fake it till you make it". After reading his whole explanation of the quote, I was quickly reminded of my old blog post about that same quote,

“Fake it ´til you make it"

People have asked me "what the hell does it mean?"
Well, it's just a phrase and basically a way of positive thinking, achieving your goals and a better life. As a child before I even had my own guitar, I knew what I was going to be when I get older. And we sure practiced in front of a mirror with my friends playing "the guitar" with tennis rackets :-) But, this is not exactly a philosophy for me, since I don't consider myself to be an idealist of any kind. But usually you have to overestimate your abilities and confidence to achieve your goals.

Wikipedia explains it this way:

"Fake it till you make it" (also called "act as if") is a common catchphrase that means to imitate confidence so that as the confidence produces success, it will generate real confidence. The purpose is to avoid getting stuck in a self fulfilling prophecy related to one's fear of not being confident, e.g., by thinking, "I can't ask that girl out because she would sense my lack of confidence."
The article How You Too Can Be an Optimist in Prevention points out, "In research at Wake Forest University, for example, scientists asked a group of 50 students to act like extroverts for 15 minutes in a group discussion, even if they didn’t feel like it. The more assertive and energetic the students acted, the happier they were".

It is often recommended as a method of overcoming depression. In this case, the idea is to go through the routines of life as if one were enjoying them, despite the fact that initially it feels forced, and continue doing this until the happiness becomes real. This is an example of a positive feedback loop.

The phrase is often associated with Alcoholics Anonymous. AA to Z; An Addictionary of the 12-Step Culture describes it as a "suggestion often made to NEWCOMERS who feel they can't get the program and will go back to old behavior. The suggestion implies that if the newcomer acts according to the steps and teachings of the program, then the program will begin to work and the anxiety will fall away".
The technique is somewhat controversial in sales settings; Take Your Team to the Top claims "That you can’t 'fake it till you make it' because you can never be consciously aware of all the things that give you away as a fraud". Source: (http://www.sonataarctica.info/site07/index.php?s=51&l=uk)

I definately agree with everything that he believes in this quote.

I would also like to add more onto this quote, "Fake it till you make it." (It will manifest itself, as soon as your mind set gets used to it.)

Some people just really need to believe in it, and have to truly try to let their whole mind and being let what you're trying to be, manifest itself. Yes, it is definately not as easy as it sounds, but you just have to REALLY REALLY TRY. It took me awhile to really get it through my head. We all live and learn, right? Or atleast... I hope you are all living and LEARNING.

I had totally forgotten about this quote. Well not completely forgot it, but I have forgotten to apply it to my life's philosophy. Thank you, Sonata Arctica's Elias for reminding me.

Once I get the money, I will definitely be ordering their albums.

I always find that music has been making HUGE craters and impacts all throughout my life. (in good ways of course)

I LOVE LIFE.

~DT

Playing the Guitar,

Oh how time flies by as you're doing something that you really enjoy.

I need to slowly train and strengthen the dexterity of my left fingers.
HURRAH FOR SCALES. Need to build the calluses up again. The top frets
are quite sharp on my fingers.

~DT

Masterbilt Photo,

~DT

Masterbilt,

Dear Internet Blog,

Today my mother bought me my baby.
The Epiphone Masterbilt.
I have yet to name you,
but I will be getting more acquainted with you everyday.
Honing my finger power skills each day.
Making sweet beautiful music with you.

~DT

Octopus + Squid,

I am obsessed with them at the moment.
Such majestic creatures.

Above picture is of an octopus doodle.
It is probably anatomically incorrect, but I really like it.

~DT

Save Like It's 1931,

I laughed so hard when I saw this sign at OSH.

~DT

First Day of School Hair + Outfit,

~DT

Newport Beach + Newport Bridge Jumping,

Steffi, Ngoc, Hannah, and I went to go boogie boarding.
The waves were fucking huge over at Newport. No joke.
The waves over at HB are pussy waves compared to this.
It was going good and everything until the biggest wave came and I
didn't dive deep enough into it and my arm bent the wrong way while I
tumbled and surrendered into it's violent embrace. And that wave isn't
as big as the ones they sometimes have.

After that wave I ran back to shore because my right arm aches.

Afterwards, we went over to the newport bridge to jump into the bay
where the yachts are anchored. There were other people that came around
the same time as we did also.

They were also hesitant of jumping but jumped in anyway.
Hannah and Ngoc jumped first. Then it was Steffi's and my turn. I was
being the baby and was extremely hesitant. I really didn't think I'd
jump. But Steffi was being very persistent and pressured me with her
countdown.

I jumped and screamed mid jump. It was an extreme rush of adrenaline.
The feeling of being in mid air for a couple seconds. My arms didn't
slap onto the surface this time.

Then we went back up for a second time. But this time Steffi was too
pusssay to jump even though she jumped a year ago. Hannah was the first
to jump and then Ngoc and I jumped at the same time. Hahaha, even
though I already jumped the first time I was still hesitant and scared.
But the support of everyone and everything ushered me to jump. This time
instead of screaming mid jump, I yelled out "HOLY FUCK". It's always
weird, yelling in mid air instead of when you're jumping right off the
bat.

The risk of jumping and getting fined $200 is also why people jump, I
think. The rush that you're doing something illegal. Hardiharhar.

All in all, it was fun. Although the water was really bad. Ugh. But
that's okay. It was a great experience. Bragging rights here I come.
W00000t..

~DT

Sunset Beach at Night,

It's empty at the beach once the sun starts setting and the night comes
creeping in.

So quiet.

Quiet enough to....... TAKE A PISS IN THE SAND SINCE THERE IS NO ONE TO
LOOK AT YOU.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF.

Thu stepped into the hole of DOOM. I feel so evil, I purposefully said
"WATCH OUT" when I already knew it was to late for her.

I kept making fun of her and her little strap on the head light thing.

It would be much better if I didn't have a pounding headache.

Ngoc and Thu roasts mini wieners on a mini propane fire thing. I want
one. It's so portable and so cool.

I be a loner and snuggle in felt blanket and try to sleep.

Go home at night. It was creepy and dark and empty.

Fun night.

~DT

Lollipop,

OH! I also forgot to add in this detail from yesterday.

While waiting at the bus stop over at central park, Alex mentioned the
word, "lollipop". And then I break out into catchy jingly song, and
sing out "Lolllipop! Lollipop! Ohhh loooliiii looliiii loooliii LOLIPOP!
*pop* ba bum bum bum."

Alex had the, o . o face. And thought I made that song up right then and
there.

I WIIIIIISSSSSSSSSH I was able to create such catchy jingles.

I'm glad you liked it Alex. <3

~DT

Safetying,

Oh yeah.
I safetyed a lot today Alex.

I AM THAT COMFORTABLE AROUND YOU!
TOTAL IMPROVEMENT! <3

I love being able to be myself around you.

~DT

Smot,

Went over to Alex's house, tried calling him, but he was asleep and
never picked up his phone.
Sat in random corner inside his neighborhood, so hot, terrible heat
wave.
Walked over to bargain store near stater bros. to obtain fire.
Jay walked about 4 times, so scary.
Walked back to Alex's neighborhood under direct heat. extremely sweaty.
Tried to coax stray dog to come towards me, but it ran away.
Saw Alex walking towards my direction.
As payback for making me wait outside for a long time in the heat, I
made Alex hold my purse and piggyback me all the way to the bus stop.
Alex nearing the end, finally got really tired from it.
I give Alex 1-2 minute break.
I hope back on again, because this is an azn sweatshop I be owning.
No vacations more than 2 minutes.
Finally got to bus stop. Snuggled Alex and showered him with kissies. He
did a great job!
I LOVE YOU FOR IT! <3

Bussed all the way to central park.
Wait inside library 4 liek evar for Abby down at the cafe.
Tried to do the "HNNNNNG" but I sound like a chipmunk having a heart
attack.
Got Alex to do it and he fell backward ded.
NO IRL HEART ATTACKS PLEASE. I BE SO SAD.
Alex go up to help guide Abby towards the cafe.
I cling onto Alex's leg and did not want to let go he said that if he
didn't come back in 30 seconds, I get to be mad at him.
Took Alex 151 seconds to come back and Abby is a lying WH0RZ.
Finally Abby came, we pretend to not acknowledge his presence.
Then made Abby do a HNNNNG.
Then it's time to wait for Ngoc.
Took a long while but that's okay, she is guest of honor.
Ngoc came on bike fashionably late.

Then smots smots forest time 2 hour forest adventure omgroflbbqsauce.
Alex and I spy spy from afar.

Then it was time to goes.
Everyone went their separate ways.
Alex and I went to bus to eat at Pho Thang Long.

On the way, an elderly viet woman did not understand English well, and
owed the bus man 25 cents more.
Alex being super gentleman manly man, paid it for her.

Get super good karma for helping others out.
You're my heroooooo Alex! Such a good boy! <3

The pho was absolutely delicious.
The waiter man knew what Alex was going to order.
I said I would have the same as Alex.
Before we ate, we washed our hands and I follow Alex to the men
bathroom.
Holy crap it smell like someone missed the urinals.
So terrible that I quickly scurried out of the bathroom.

I went to wash my hands and come out to see that Alex ditched me and
went back to the tables. Hmph!

We ate and Alex said eating the pho was better than sex.
DTNP > PHO (AHEMS AHEMS!!!)

I #1 TOP LIST OF ALL THINGS GOOD AND TRUE.

Then we finished and I WAS THE ONE WHO PAID.
Just you know, clarifying it.

Then we walk to bus stop.
Last bus ride for the day with Alex!
I got very teary eyed. I hate goodbyes.
I get to see you in 5 days Alex! School!!

But still, I be a cry baby and cry cry cry.
We hugged and kissies and then the bus stopped at Alex's destination.

Now it was my turn to bus back to Ngoc's house.
It is very lonesome, waiting over at the bus stops by one's self.

I am now over at 5 Points. Getting closer.
Probably going to be walking the rest by foot!
It is getting darker.
I hope I get there soon enough before it gets extremely dark.

Such a pity that I did not bring my camera.
I wanted to take lots of pictures and record videos.

Perhaps, another time!

~DT

More Sharpie Pictures,

The colorful bird next to the blue sun is Sang's.
The simple red bird head next to Sang's is mine.
The angry bird is Ngoc's.

~DT

Writing at Office Depot,

OMG. IM SO BAD ASS & REBELLIOUS, WRITING ON THE SHARPIE TABLETOPS. OMG.
IM SO COOL.

I AM ALSO A GOOD ASS FOR RE-ORGANIZING THEIR SHARPIES BACK TO THEIR
RIGHTFUL COLORS AND TIP TYPES.

FUCK YES. DOES THAT MAKE ME NEUTRAL?!?!

HOLY SHIT. EVEN BETTER. BALANCE.

--

Sang drew me this cute picture.

~DT

Suck My Toes,

Oh yeah. I totally forgot this most important part in my post about my day with Alex on the 24th.

*___________* Yes Alex, I LOVED IT. FEEEEELS SO GUT MANNNNG. <3

If only I am able to private this post.
Then I would go into all detail about it.

I LOVE YOU EVEN MORE FOR THIS~<3
I think they were clean when you committed this chivalrous act.

If only I got to record it.

~DT

A Picture of a Girl in the Meadow,

Right when I saw this picture, it immediately struck a chord in my heart.
If any of you knew me by now, you would have already known about my thing for meadows.

I am not sure why, but I had always, ever since I was a little girl have been captivated and attracted to empty, rural, rarely been touched meadow-like places.

It's so silently beautiful and magical.

I've been stumbling upon fashion blog after fashion blog this morning, and thank you Camille for posting up these pictures photographed by Erik Madigan Heck from Nomenus Quarterly.

~DT

Kayaking + Bridge Jumping,

Today, I went kayaking with ngoc.

It required lots of arm muscles. I remember the first time I went
kayaking. I was in 7th grade and it was with girl scouts, the girl I was
partnered up with frigging flipped the kayak over. Making me all wet
and grose.

Anyways,

In the beginning, I made Ngoc do all the work because I wanted to be a
total bish. BWAHAHAHAHA.

"WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? GEORGE WASHINGTON??" "YES, ONWARDS MY
COMRADES!!!"
"COMRADES IS A MUTUAL TERM. YOU'RE SUPPOSE TO BE ROWING TOO IF YOU WERE
A COMRADE TOO?"
"OH.. WELL THEN ONWARDS MY SLAVE!!!!!!"

And then we went along until we saw the bridge in around Trinidad
Island. We parked the kayak. Lolparked near the park playing area and it
took Ngoc forever to coax me out to jump off the bridge.

I got on the bridge and I just stayed at the edge for like a while. And
these other kids wanted to jump off the bridge too. It was fucking crazy
the little kid did a freaking back flip into the water. Sweeeet jesus.

Lol oh yeah. It's against the rules to jump off the bridge too. Tehheeh
so badass breaking the laws. Wheeee..

Anyways, it took me fucking forever to jump. I was extremely scared of
heights. And it was pretty high. But not super high. But high enough to
scare the shit out of me. But with some coaxing and persuasio n I finall
took the plunge into the water. It felt very.. Hrmm.. A lot of air a
kind of liberating feeling. And also the feeling that you have no where
else to go but down. It's a feeling where you are completely out of
control. I dunno. It was pretty cool.The rush into the water made my top
go up but I quickly fixed it under water. I jumped again. This time at
the same time as Ngoc. My upper arms kind of flopped onto the surface of
the water, because my arms were slightly bent in a 90 degree angle. It
stung for a bit but that's okay. The water was pretty deep. Deep enough
that you don't touch the bottom once you jump off.

Then we got back onto the kayaks.
The waters were extremely salty. Like super super salty.

We kayaked back pretty fast this time. Probably because I didn't take a
lot of rests and didn't make Ngoc do all of the work.

Ngoc wanted to go into the water so I let her go.
No way in the heck would I go into the water again.
It's cold and its salty and you don't know what these yachts illegally
dump into the waters. D: ewwieee. Waste. But whatever. Taking risks
mang. I paddled away and pretended to leave her behind. AHAHHAAHA it was
hilarious. Other people thought we needed help. It was very nice of them
to ask us. But yeah, we didn't need any help. Ngoc was just screaming
her ass off. HAHAHAHA.

I made her push the kayak as I paddled.
She decided to go back up on the kayak and the whole process scared me
shitless because I didn't want the kayak to flip over. We ended up
drifting backwards a couple yards.

We paddled back prettttty fast.

Cool experiences and memories were made today.
Thx Ngoc! You and your dangerous shenanigans.

~DT

My Nephew Tristan,

He was born on August 20th, 2009!
I got to hold him for the first time today!
He was crying from hunger but then after a bit of rocking and cooing and
meowing, he stopped crying.

I am a lot nicer to babies now.
I'm definitely a lot better with kids!
I learn from the past and with observation.

I Love Tristan!

BWAHHAHAHAAHA.

I whispered to him, "I will make you into a pretty boy."

I wonder if that phrase will forever register inside his mind.
That'd be preeeeeeeetty awesome.

~DT

Alex, Front Doors, & More,

My mama dropped me off at Alex's house around 1:30PM; 2PM(???) since
Alex had to go to work a bit in the morning.

I come over and then I stood at the fence because I did not have a clue
onto how to open it.. Oh wait, well, I DID have a clue, but it was a
wrong and retarded clue. In the end, Alex ended up opening the fence for
me BECAUSE I AM HIS EMPRESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then we proceed towards his cozy little garage mini house
compartmentmabobber. I picked the movie "Shall we dance?" and Alex said
no because HE SAID HE ALREADY WATCHED THAT MOVIE A FEW DAYS AGO. Ahems
ahems. I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT ALLL ALONGGG DAT WUZNT TR00 AND DAT U WERE
LYING TO MEEEE SO THAT WE DON'T HAVE TO WATCH IT. But then we ended up
watching it anyways. Thanks to my pleeeeeaaaaading azn persuasion
skillz.

I barely got to watch the movie. I was too distracted because of Alex. I
was just laying around on his chest and staring at him and making weird
faces at him and poke at him and sprawl around like a little baby. So
whenever I did watch it and had my glimpse of it I was asking Alex all
these questions about "why he do dat?" "what's going on?" "who is she?"
"what da heo he doing?" "omgah srsly???" etc etc.

Rolling, rolling, & some more rolling.

Then I tried to lock Alex out the door. But he kept on pounding on it
trying to get in. It was soft little knocks at first slowly trying to
coax me to open the door. And then after awhile the pound on the door
got harder and louder. And then I finally let him inside and he catched
me and gived me comforting huggles all throughout the whole time.
I LOVE YOUR COMFORTING HUGS ALEX! He asked me 2 times if I was okay. Of
course I'm okay. Just for you, Alex~<3

Rusty door things need oil or something of the like, or else it'd be
squeaking uncomfortably all day. Such an annoying thing that would be.

Then movie was over.

Alex wanted to throw a "waterballoon" thingy over at his messcan
neighbor's house because they kept on throwing things over to his
house.

But then Alex decided to blow up the ballooon instead.
IT WAS FREAKING HUUUUUUUGE ONCE HE BLEW IT UP. IT WAS CLOBBERIN' TIME,
so then I hugged it real hard till it finally blew up. Ewwwwie, balloon
remnants errywhur.

Then we takes a naaaaaps. I lurve Alex cuddle time.

Then Alex's mother came and brought home spaghetti! I'd have to say, it
was really delicious!

And then Alex's father came home for a bit. He came into the room to go
wash his hands.

When Alex went out, he asked Alex, if I was PANTSLESS. AAHHAHHAAHAAHA
that must've been real awkward for his father, thinking that the whole
time, I was pantsless sitting on Alex's bed. I WAS JUST WEARING SHORTS
THAT WERE COVERED BY MY REALLY LONG SHIRT. I SWEAR!!!!

Then we has more snuggles and cuddles and naps times.
I LOVE IT WHEN YOU SPOON ME.
Way back when, way before I knew what spooning even was, it always
sounded like something really dirty and baaaad and that only adults do
it. (Like some kind of sex position or some shiet.) BUT THEN RECENTLY,
OTHERS HAD TOLD ME IT WAS JUST A CUDDLING POSITION. LIKE SPOONS! Where
they fit perfectly with each other.

(((IS THAT TMI FOR OTHER READERS?!??????? GOD DAMN IT. I JUST WISH THAT
THERE WERE SUCH THINGS AS PRIVATE POSTS ON BLOGGER. BUT OH WELL, I
ALREADY WARNED ALL OF YOU PEOPLES ON MY ABOUT ME, ABOUT MY TMI TYPE OF
POSTS. SO EITHER DEAL WITH IT OR GET THE FUUUUUUUUUCK OUT.)))

Anyway, Alex's daddy says that mommy was lonely and to come keep her
company. So Alex went out to his mother and I followed behind and sat on
the farthest chair near the PC. Then Alex beckoned me to come over and I
was just staring back at him hesitantly. Then his mama starts doing the
same and then I am finally sure! So I slowly came towards the bed where
they were at and I sat at the edge. Alex is still beckoning for me to
lay down next to them, but I look back at him unsure, thinking if that
was too much?? Or like... invasion of private family times or
something... ;___; but then Alex's mama did the same! Lightly patting on
the pillow next to Alex. *____* I AM WELCOMED AND ACCEPTED INTO ALEX AND
HIS MOTHER'S CIRCLE. FINALLY THIS MOMENT I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR. ;___;

ALEX, I LOVE YOU, AND YOUR MOTHER. <3!!!

TEEHHEHEHE I can finally tell people, I have been in bed with both Alex
and his mama. Wink wink wink. Owait. OMGAH. LOL. That's kind of
wrong.... But oh well. It is what it is. *_*

Afterwards, we go over towards the hamsters and I tell Alex to let out
Dirtbag so we cans play with him.

I got to hold Dirtbag and IT WAS THE MOST COOLEST BUT STRANGEST
EXPERIENCE EVER! A small shivering and vibrating life form standing on
the palms of my hands. It was a weird feeling at first but then, I
quickly got accustomed to it. Then we play around with Dirtbag and then
I ask Alex to put him on my lap. Oh boy, was that a wrong move. I WAS
BEING TICKLED TO DEATH, FROM EVERY STEP THAT DIRTBAG HAD TAKEN. IT WAS
THE ULTIMATE TORTURE DEVICE. I COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING AND I WANTED IT TO
STOP TICKLING BUT I COULDN'T DO A THING. I can't just SMACK it off or
BRUSH it off or PUSH it off or do anything of that nature that'd hurt
poor Dirtbag.

I simply had to TAKE IT. Until finally Alex lifts him off of me.
But then to torture me again, ALEX PUT DIRTBAG BACK ON MY LAP. ;____; OH
THE TORTURE.....

OH! And also, we alternately made little flats out of our hands as
bridges so Dirtbag could crossover. It was cute, watching him quickly
skittered away from hand to hand.

And then Dirtbag grew tired or something because he didn't wanna move
much. So we had to put him back into the cage.

We went back into his room and watched some more tv. Messed around. OH
YEAH. I WRAPPED ALEX IN A BURRITO/COCOON/CHRYSALIS. I wanted to wrap him
up super tight so that he would be FOREVER TRAPPED and unable to move.
But in the end, he got freeeee. But, NEVER AGAIN!!!!

Then it was time for me to go go. Since Alex's mama was also going over
to Grandmother's.

They dropped me off at home and I give her my thanks and goodbye and I
give Alex a big hug.

LOL my father just came home from work and was watching the whole time.

I had a super great day on August 22nd, 2009.
I apologize for the 2 day late post!

I LOVE YOU ALEX!

P.S: & since, August 19th, 2009; HAPPY 16TH MONTH!
It's been 1 whole year + 4 months!

WE WILL MAKE IT ALL THE WAY THROUGH!

~DT

Trippy Dalmation Cup,

~DT